Operation Fat to Fit: Week Three

The title of this post is really misleading. I have not been at this for three weeks, rather I am entering my third week. Now that I’ve cleared that up, we can get to more important matters. Aunt Flo has graced me with her presence, which means a few things: 1. I am hungry. All the time. I want to shove salty pretzels into my mouth until my lips burn, and I could really go for some homemade butternut squash ravioli. 2. I am evil. I don’t have much patience for anyone, and can’t even stand myself. My poor family has been tolerating me with as much restraint as possible, but I may find myself locked out of the house tonight. 3. I am retaining water like nobody’s business. I could probably rectify that problem by not consuming salt as though it were a meal, and upping my water intake. I usually am pretty good with water, but it just doesn’t taste as pleasant when Aunt Flo is visiting. During these visits, I just want sweet tea by the boatload. Not that nasty, brisk brewed crap that some of you Yanks refer to as iced tea. No, I am referring to the stuff that contains enough sugar to send your pancreas on strike. My mouth waters just thinking about it.

Anywho, I didn’t really come here to tell you about my monthly woes. I weigh myself on Mondays, and was pleasantly surprised to find that despite my massive water retention, I am down another four pounds. That gives me a total loss of eleven pounds in two weeks. I didn’t work out as often this past week as I should have, but that will change this week for sure.

I received an email from a friend asking what I was doing/eating, so I thought I would answer that here instead of replying to her email and leaving you out of the loop. I am eating small meals throughout the day, and have completely eliminated most white stuff (with the exception of salt, obviously). So no sugar, white bread, white pasta, or white rice. The bread and pasta have never been a problem for me, since I prefer whole grain anyway. But the sugar? Lord, help me. That could be part of the reason why I feel so angry. When I cut sugar out, I think I must have experienced what a drug addict does when they go into rehab. I am not exaggerating. I have my own conspiracy theories about the sugar industry and their attempt to take over the world by adding crack to sugar, turning us into helplessly addicted minions who will submit blindly to their will. But that’s not the point I am trying to make. What I’m saying is that my name is Afsana, and I am a sugar addict. I have been addicted to sugar for as long as I can remember, and have never gone more than two days without a fix. I’m being serious here. But I have been clean for two weeks and counting. That’s a big deal for me. If I can do it, I know you can as well.

In addition to eating as little processed food as possible, I have also been exercising. I had a ten pound kettlebell collecting dust in my closet, so I was very happy to see that Gaiam TV had a kettlebell workout video by The Firm, called Transfirm Your Trouble Zones. If you exercise regularly, this video may not give you much of a challenge. If you are a couch potato, be warned. Your quads and glutes will be on fire for days afterwards. Good luck trying to climb stairs. The video is supposed to be done with five pound kettlebells, so I was already working double time with my heavier one. But after doing the routine three times, I noticed I was able to get through it without huffing and puffing quite as hard. It really is amazing how the human body can adapt to challenges.

I don’t have a set rotation for my workouts, though I probably should create some sort of schedule so I can get an idea for what combination gives me the best results. Since the Monday before last, I have shaved two inches off each of my thighs, so I think kettlebells are some sort of miracle. I do the kettlebell workout regularly as well as Zumba Exhilarate and Winsor Pilates. I have heard people talk about how the Zumba DVD’s don’t give you as much of a challenge as a live class. That is probably true, but I don’t have the option of going to a live class since I normally work out at around 9:30 at night. For a person whose endurance level is similar to my own, the DVD’s will still give you a great workout. I don’t know if I will feel the same way 50 pounds from now, but they definitely fit my needs for the time being.

My BFF did the math and in order to stay on track with the 15 week half marathon training plan available on the Biggest Loser site, we have to get started no later than the week after next. The following week, I will probably write a post explaining how signing up to run a half marathon clearly demonstrates my mental instability. Until then, I am really looking forward to hitting the pavement.

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